Now the real Games begin

WHEN ANDY and Jamie Murray made their rather undignified exit from the 2008 Olympics, you suspected all they wanted to do was to get a fast boat out of China.

They were in the minority.

Because for many, end of competition means the real start of the Games.

Let's just say the athletes village - housing over 16,000 competitors - has a condom allocation of 100,000 ... and supplies are expected to be strained.

Clubs that your average, portly hack could get into with a nod and a flash of the accreditation card just a week ago are now the sole preserve of six foot five swimmers and girls with unfeasibly broad shoulders.

Two thousand of them descended on an establishment called Club Bud after the final day's competition in the Water Cube and the party went on longer than your average opening ceremony.

But while for some, these Games might produce the briefest of liaisons, for others it can mean finding the partner of your dreams.

That is what happened to American shooter Matthew Emmons.

His is a story that would bring a tear to a glass eye.

When Emmons flexed his trigger finger for his last shot in Athens 2004, all he had to do to claim gold was to hit the target ... anywhere.

Think taking a penalty - without a keeper. Think cow's backside, think banjo.

He duly hit the target. The wrong one. He had only fired at the one next door.

But amidst the tears, he clapped eyes on beautiful Czech shooter Katerina, who then became Mrs Emmons.

And no, it wasn't a shotgun wedding.

Four years on and Katerina won the first gold medal of these Games. She then retreated to the commentary box to watch her husband try and make up for his Greek tragedy.

Coming to the last shot, he was a distance clear of second-placed opponent Qiu Jian but this time he had to hit the target in a reasonably central area.

It's anyone who hasn't got the DTs could make - one Emmons could pull off blindfolded.

And you know the rest. He missed, the Chinese man took gold and Matthew fell into the stunned arms of his missus who, by now, had practically fallen out of the commentary box.

More astonishing was the reaction of the locals. Polite applause for their winner - a standing ovation for the heartbroken American.

Great sportsmanship and proof that these are not automatons, whose emotions are programmed and whose smiles are faked.

****Paul Goodison wins the Laser class in sailing. Which is the only chance of a medal going to Goodison for a long time.

****Spending half my waking hours at the Laoshan cycling venue over the last few days, I know what Frankie Goes to Hollywood were referring to when they mentioned the Pleasuredome. To be a Brit in the Olympic velodrome was weird - gallant losers we are used to being, arrogant champs we are not. But the highlight was the Madison, which is quite simply unfathomable. You kept expecting Dastardly and Muttley to turn up.

****Great Britain flying high, the Games nearing an end .. so cue the glory-jumpers. Sorry, important politicians and decision-makers. Tony Blair was at the veldorome on Tuesday, Boris Johnson is in mid-air and Gordon Brown arrives Thursday.