GOALDEN BLUNDER IS A GOLDEN WONDER

Fabio Capello understands the value of Emile Heskey

EMILE HESKEY - another chance goes begging for England
EMILE HESKEY - another chance goes begging for England

EMILE HESKEY ought to team up with Ainsley Harriott and launch a new TV show. I can just see it now: 'Can't Score, Won't Score'.

The masterclass would surely be a ratings smash, teaching young strikers just how you can become England's World Cup centre-forward without actually being able to hit a cow's backside with a banjo.

Wearing a No.9 shirt usually carries a certain responsibility, plus the assumption said player can actually put the ball in the old onion bag.

Heskey, however, has brilliantly bucked tradition to become England's best worst striker of all time.

Peter Withe, Brian Deane, Michael Ricketts and Darius Vassell could also stake a claim to that title.

And Glenn Hoddle once humiliated Andy Cole by suggesting he needed seven chances to score a single goal at international level.

Exception

On that basis, Heskey - seven goals from 56 appearances - has even raised the bar on ineptitude.

Yet providing Heskey avoids serious injury he will lead the England line in South Africa even if he doesn't score another international goal between now and next summer.

Fabio Capello thinks so much of Heskey the England manager admits he will make him an exception to his golden rule and pick a player regardless of form.

But there is logic in Capello's thinking. Heskey has become something akin to a rugby union prop or an American football linebacker.

Lump

Rarely will he claim a score himself but he constantly cuts a swathe in defences, creating space for others.

And when he's run the opposition ragged, Heskey can make way for Jermain Defoe to pick off a weary defence.

Has it taken an Italian to come to the conclusion that an England team is best served by having a good old-fashioned centre forward - or lump, depending on your stand-point - as the focal point?

That is why Capello also likes to have Can't Control, sorry, Carlton Cole and Peter Crouch around the squad. But when it comes to all-round contribution, Heskey is the most menacing of that tall tree trio.

When it was pointed out to Heskey that Defoe has scored more goals for England in the last 15 months than he has in 10 years, the Villa man reasoned: "Stats don't tell you everything." And he's right.

Destruction

The most important stat is winning games and England do that more often than not when Heskey plays.

Over the past decade, whenever England have produced their best displays, such as Wednesday's humiliation of Croatia or the destruction of Germany, Heskey has been an integral part.

The time has come for everyone to get off his back, respect Heskey for what he is - a rare breed of striker who takes pleasure in making sure the team wins without scoring goals himself.

Although let's just hope that if push comes to shove next summer, it doesn't boil down to Heskey taking a penalty.

Your comments

This article has 16 comments

Rooney is also a diver, he went down easily Slovenia and the English supporters / media are all happy they won't say anything negative about him. He dived against Arsenal, again they protected him because he's English.

By Zaki.. Posted September 7 2009 at 9:03 AM.

The referee at the Arsenal v Celtic game had to watch the video evidence again and said his decision to give a penalty was correct, UEFA said it would never interfere or overule an officials decision, from the video i have seen the evidence is inconclusive, Owen v Argentina 2002, Gerrard v Sheff Utd 2007/2008, even Rooney v Arsenal on more than one occasion are far more clear cut dives yet no word of cheating in the press on these occasions. Diving is ruining the game but poor journalism is far worse, too much bias towards England and English players, the real cheats wear Red, White and Blue.

By Dave H.. Posted September 6 2009 at 4:28 PM.

Whilst I agree that diving has become one of the most hated things inthe game, does it really warrant the punishment handed down. If you watch the matches from Spain, Italy, Germany and even Brazil etc; you will see this "simulation" in virtually every match. Ronaldo even cited referees in Spain would give him "more protection", as one of the reasons for his move to Real Madrid. So unless all leagues are going to take action then this cancer will continue to infect the game. Perhaps some heavy fines to clubs whose players persistently offend. However this would only work if Mr. Platini or Mr. Blatter would be a little more even handed in the way they deal with problems within the game. This week we have seen the way things pan out in the world game, with over the top punishments handed out to Arsenal and Chelsea. Perhaps the time has come for the clubs to get the lawyers involved, or is this the problem, that they already are involved.

By KPS.. Posted September 6 2009 at 11:40 AM.

Shep,

Spot on about diving, and taking the medicine. The truth is, since all these academies were introduced, coaches have failed to instil respect for the most important aspect of the game in young players. Instead, these players - Owen; Cole J; Gerrard; Rooney et al have learned their dishonesty at these acadamies.

Football is simply MEANT to be a sporting endavour between two sets of players.

The most important lesson is that their talent means nothing when it is abused. Their diving is exactly the same as drugs cheats in athletics and academies should educate them as kids and pubish them accordingly. It is the ethos of sport that is threatened and needs protecting with exemplary sanctions.

By Damien.. Posted September 6 2009 at 10:06 AM.

Totally agree the way Arsenal players fall over when no one is near them is a disgrace to football. How the blind Arsenal fans can compare a player going over because there is nowhere left to go to a player just falling over when no one is near him i will never know. Player are told if they are touched go down which i cannot see a problem with. Arsenal players try it without a tackle been made.

By Carl Warmington.. Posted September 6 2009 at 9:56 AM.

Who says Eduardo dived? The press and EUFA!

The referee and three match officials think otherwise. The referee was right behind the incident, and you can clearly see the Celtic goalkeeper catch Eduardos right foot.

There was contact.

All the complaining and referee chasing was done by Celtic. Eduardo and the Arsenal team were clearly surprised. So where is the deception?

By viva los gooners.. Posted September 6 2009 at 9:41 AM.

Shep,

I think you need to bring some context to this. Name a single manager that has ever come out and slated his own player for diving. Fergerson would always change it to how Ronaldo gets kicked all game. He doesn't even mention Rooney. And nor do the media.

Wenger is trying to stop Eduardo getting a 2 game ban for the better of Arsenal, because that is his concern. Fact is that UEFA will not be enforcing this new 'ruling' throughout the season and did it on a wim to keep others happy, so why should he be the only person in sport who has to play it by the books.

Other teams and managers don't, the governing bodies don't, players don't, and the media certainly don't. The only people with any morals in football are refs, and see how they are treated!!!!!

Sorry Shep but if Wenger damned Eduardo, and then it broke the unity in our squad and we began dropping points you would be saying what a bad move it was by Wenger and how Mourinho or Fergy would never of done such a thing making the player himself the most important thing of this whole argument.

Please write an article about what we're all talking about- and thats about the moral purity and honest of English players, how they have come out and claimed to be honest is frightening, and someone needs to bring these players down to planet earth!!

By cheese.. Posted September 6 2009 at 8:37 AM.

If Shep is saying Arsene Wenger got it wrong fighting Eduardo's ban, when was this law introduced in banning players who deceive refrees? Was it no 2004? So is Shep saying over since this was introduced (2004) no player has ever dive or cheat the referee? Come on and Shep call black black and white white. The decision was not even clear to say he dive or not.

By Peter Akpetey.. Posted September 6 2009 at 7:33 AM.

And what do you think of Rooney's tumble against Slovenia yesteray, when he fouled the defender, took a tumble by his own, and sat down raising his hands like a crying baby asking for a penalty?

Or the penalty he claimed against Arsenal last weekend when he started going down even before Almunia made contact?

If you loathe "DECEIT", don't you think you should be writing about Rooney as well? Or the criticisms don't apply to him just because he is English?

By Sam.. Posted September 6 2009 at 7:41 AM.

i dont think wenger is fighting to say eduardo never dived,more that his player is being used as a scapegoat.yes diving has been around for a long time now,but how uefa went about it over ruling the refs final decision,i think you to mr shep know that was'nt the right why to go about it..if they really want to make a stance let it be knonw that if a player tries to con the ref in future it would be a straight red..when liverpool are down in the 85minute we all know gerrards going to get the ball run at defenders hoping to get touched we've seen it so often,drogba,torres,ronaldo,eboue,rooney its not a foreign thing its a football thing,yes we have to deal with it,but properly not to single out one player..just like the bung taking we hear other managers were on the take but only george graham got caught...

By ashburtonpalace.. Posted September 6 2009 at 3:58 AM.

As an Arsenal supporter I was stunned that TV pandits on ITV were focusing sooo much on Eduardo's dive that they completely forgot to talk about the game itself. No one at any moment thought that this guy had a very serious injury and as such you want to protect yourself by going down rather than challenge the contact (if any)!
THAT HE GETS BANNED FOR 2 GAMES WHEN IT IS JUST A YELLOW CARD OFFENSE DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. bUT i ACCEPT IT.
Nevertheless as UEFA start this kind of retrospective sanctions I would like to see some consistency in getting their act together otherwise they will be the vilest bunch of hypocripts. Let's take an exemple: Messi's headbutting during the supercup? This should be banned from football too. Has anyone done anything? Just a couple of comments and that's it. All done sorted nothing to add. On the other hand medias went to length over Eduardo's alleged dive and that is disgusting!
So let's wait and see all other similar dives in the Champions league and see what kind on actions those f****rs in the UEFA will do to condom it. Remember C Ronaldo in the World cup 2006 and his blantant serial dives? Did anyone do anything? His dives where good enough for him to get a gold medal in the Olympic games! What a joke!!!

By Marty Macfly.. Posted September 6 2009 at 1:35 AM.

Had it been the case that banning eduardo was the start of UEFA getting tough on all diving offences with retrospective bans, I would think it somewhat unfair because this directive was not spoken about before the season started, and there were a number of offences in big games last year - Gerrard vs Atletico is a good example - where no-one even considered banning him despite the indisputable video evidence.
However, if this were the start of an anti-diving campaign, fine. Its not in the spirit of the game, so as long as everyone is treated the same from now on, its fair enough.
However, UEFA spits in the face of *Arsenal* when it then says it has no plans to continue retrospective banning! The campaign against eduardo has all been driven by the media and Scottish FA and UEFA is more than happy to go along with it. Disgusting.

By Davi.. Posted September 6 2009 at 1:04 AM.

Shep, I would really like to hear your opinion as an English "journalist" (and I use that term loosely) about the activity of players like Rooney and Gerrard regarding he laws of fair play. There is certainly plenty of evidence to retrospectively ban them is there not?

By Zane.. Posted September 6 2009 at 12:36 AM.

MR Shepperd
Yes eduardo should be banned but lets remeber rooney against arsenal when they were going for 50 unbeaten, sol campbell withdrew his leg no contact and rooney hit the deck ( deceit and cheating all in one).

all players must be treated the same even useless english ones

By david power.. Posted September 6 2009 at 12:29 AM.

I do not think you could have pouted the same trash if it had been Rooney or Steve Gerrard.Why is Eduardo being portrayed as a serial diver? There are players out there whose game hinges on conning the match officials...week in week out.You let them go scotfree but launch a witch hunt on Eduardo.
The fact that Wenger hasn't condemned him in public does not mean that he advocates diving. It's all to do with personnel management skills, which I think you lack. Even the inexperienced coaches wouldn't want to go that route.Good coaches handle such matters in-house.

By Themba.. Posted September 5 2009 at 10:54 PM.

your not makeing any sense at all shep your not on talksport radio now with those puppets alan brazil and ronnie irani with there usuall agenda against foreign players and managers like eduardo and mr wenger if you and talksport radio want to tackle cheating and diveing then may i suggest you look at golden boy rooney and while your at it steven gerrard and john terry and most other british and english players get up to first its all good and well the likes of rooney and terry saying english players dont dive and cheat but its a well known fact they do it happens across the board but its allways the foreigners that get targeted you only have to look at the penalty yesterday by rooney it was never a pen in a million years!

By jimmy.. Posted September 5 2009 at 10:45 PM.

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