UTD WEE STAND

Wayne Rooney and Cristiano Ronaldo are peed off over new daily urine tests

Rooney
DOWN THE TUBE: Rooney

THE soccer superstars of Manchester United are really peed off-they're being forced to provide a urine sample EVERY DAY.

The first team squad have to get their tackle out and wee into bottles for medics at their Carrington training ground.

Scientists then test the liquid and record what is in it-with the goal of finding ways to improve the players' performance.

But the Premier League leaders-including the likes of Wayne Rooney and Cristiano Ronaldo-are being driven loo-py by the new rule.

An insider said: "During training when the lads get caught short, they use a bush as the main complex is too far away. But they forget they still have to come in and give a sample, which means it can be a long wait for some of them!

"Afterwards the science boys have all these little bottles to work through. It's a bizarre sight-some joke they'd fetch a lot on eBay."

The testing regime is in full flow as Man Utd chase a record five trophies this season.

The players have long had a wacky sense of toilet humour- taking potshots at team-mates' heads as they use the bushes.

Boss Sir Alex Ferguson says one of the best passes he's ever seen was a Paul Scholes 40-yarder at Ryan Giggs taking a leak.

Meanwhile, rival fans will be wetting themselves. After all, it's not every day you get the chance to take the pee out of Man Utd !

Your comments

This article has 2 comments

You could never cremate Rooney. It would take 2 years to put the fire out !

By Mark.. Posted March 8 2009 at 2:10 AM.

ROONEYS SAMPLE anayisas,came out as budwieser, and ronaldos was LUST perfume

By phil.. Posted March 8 2009 at 12:40 AM.

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