Out of this Wold

LISTEN very carefully and you might just hear it.

Didn't get anything? Try again. And . . .

Yup, there it is. A pin. Dropping. Probably in the sweet little rose-covered house next door. Or even the beautiful cottage over the lane with the scruffy sheep nibbling at the wisteria.

Because this, ladies and gentlemen, is quite possibly The Quietest Village In England.

You'll have never heard of Hidcote Boyce, nestling on the side of a small hill deep in the heartland of England.

That's because it's been hidden in the shadow of the Cotswolds' better-known travel hotspots. And I do feel a slight pang of guilt giving it up now. But here goes . . .

Hidcote Boyce is a tiny hamlet of ancient, honey-coloured stone houses where you can get away from the usual touristy hustle and bustle, yet still be right in the thick of it.

A blink of an eye down the road is the enormously beautiful town of Chipping Campden. It's enough just to stand in the main street and gawp at the incredible gorgeousness of the place, let alone lose a day in its little shops, olde worlde pubs and restaurants.

An hour's walk (yes, WALK, you big softy) south of Hidcote lands you in the excellent 17th century gourmet pub, the Ebrington Arms, in Ebrington. (Make sure you book early if you plan to eat near the end of the week).

The journey back may well take longer, but you probably won't notice.

Trudge north from HB for 20 minutes and you will enter the remarkably relaxing Arts and Crafts gardens of Hidcote Manor.

It's a slice of paradise built by Major Lawrence Johnston in 1907, who subsequently became a World War I hero. Once you've had enough of the Tapestry Hedges, Chinese Handkerchief Tree and Skunk Cabbage, it's finally time to do something for the kids.

Cuddly

They'll be agog at the exciting displays at the Cotswold Falconry Centre, a mile from Moreton in Marsh, where eagles soar and, if you're lucky enough, you can feel the wind from the wings of a Harris Hawk as it brushes over your head.

For budding fa-a-a-rmers, there's Cotswold Farm Park, near Guiting Power, north-east of Cheltenham, which is run by the BBC's Countryfile presenter Adam Henson.

Here you'll find cuddly rabbits, pigs, goats, and cows with big curly horns. You can see lambs being born, if it's spring, and actually bottle-feed them. And there are demos of sheep shearing from mid-May right into the start of summer. There's also a big children's playground. If the area does have a golden centre, it has to be Bourton-on-the- Water. The town sits astride a shallow river teeming with trout and crossed by pretty little stone bridges.

At one end is charming Birdland, home to more than 500 birds including king penguins, flamingos, parrots, hornbills and toucans. Nearby is the magical Dragonfly Maze with an Indiana Jones-style treat in the middle (I won't spoil it).

And best of all is the miniature village, an exact (probably) replica of the whole town.

You can see tiny versions of the lovely gift shops and tea rooms that you've just visited. And hear the choirs singing in the two churches. And, guess what, there's another miniature version of the village in the miniature village itself - and another one in that and so on. Just brilliant!

Sorry mums, but for dads and slightly older boys the Heritage Motor Museum has to be done.

Yes, it IS a bit of a drive - just off junction 12 of the M40. And, no, I won't try to explain the emotional pull of staring dewy-eyed at terrible old British cars you may have owned. However, it will keep the men busy for hours. And after that, they can even go go-karting!

OK, let's move on . . .

Spooky

When it rains, an unusual salvation awaits you in the home of William Shakespeare.

Stratford's Brass Rubbing Centre has a couple of big points going for it: One, it's dry and two it's brilliant fun.

Entry is free and for just 95p they'll show you how to do your own brass rubbing. Children absolutely love it.

But one thing they adore more than anything else is venturing to Warwick Castle. The place is packed with suits of armour, big gory weapons, amazing state rooms and spooky corridors. My nine-year-old triplets William, Oliver and Nicholas loved it.

You can go right up on the battlements, catch the jousting, try your hand at archery and fencing, have lessons in sword and dagger-fighting and even see a great flaming ball being fired by a giant trebuchet.

If your youngsters are REALLY boisterous (and VERY brave), you might want to send them down into the newly-opened dungeons.

The geniuses at Warwick Castle (www.warwick-castle.co.uk ) have used special effects, actors and a touch of magic to recreate the medieval world of plague, torture and execution in wonderfully horrible detail.

Our holiday home in Hidcote Boyce was the charming stone-built Bank Cottage, which sleeps six in comfort.

It's packed to the wooden beams with period style and has a cosy woodburner in the sitting room for wet days when you don't want to venture out.

In fact, once you're there in the peace and quiet, you'll never want to leave at all.

Getting there

SEVEN nights at Bank Cottage costs from £490 (www.chipping-campden-holiday-cottages.co.uk or call 01789 841525).

Also see www.cotswolds.com and www.twitter.com/CotswoldsInfo for details on the Cotswolds, and www.enjoyengland.com for further details on all counties.

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