Dear Jane: I'VE been in hell since I cheated on my fiancé during my hen weekend in Blackpool. Should I should call off the wedding?

Me and my mates found there was a stag party staying at our hotel. They were wild guys and we had a drink and a laugh with them before we hit the clubs.

We bumped into them again when we arrived back at the hotel in the early hours. We were all drunk and went to the bar with them and got drunker.

I got talking to the bridegroom while the others were playing drinking games. He was going on about how we were both just about to lose our freedom, and he made marriage sound like a prison sentence.

For the life of me I can't understand why I began to think he had a point. All I've ever wanted to do was marry my lovely fiancé.

I can't remember how we got on to the subject of sex, but we started talking about what an awesome thought it was that neither of us would be able to have sex with anyone else but our other halves for the rest of our lives. Then he suddenly said, how about a quickie while there's still time?

Next thing I knew we were upstairs in his room having noisy, drunken sex. I didn't even know his name. When I eventually went back to the room I was sharing with my best friend, the drink was wearing off and reality of what I'd done had started to dawn on me.

Thank goodness she was totally crashed out. Next day she told me she didn't even remember going to bed let alone what had gone on the night before, so that was something to be thankful about.

We didn't get to see the stag party lads again as we left before they got up. On the journey home I felt bad, and it wasn't just a hangover. How could I have cheated on my fiancé? We've been together since school, and I've never wanted anyone else.

Until that night I'd only ever slept with him.

He would be devastated if he knew-but how can I marry him with this on my conscience?

Should I even be getting married? I don't know what to do for the best.

JANE SAYS: GUILT is obviously going to gnaw away at you until you come clean to your fiancé.

Of course he'll be hurt but hopefully he'll realise it was just a case of too much alcohol and he'll love you enough to forgive you.

You can then start married life with a clean slate. If you had no doubts about getting married before this happened, don't let one drunken mistake change anything.

Best get checked out at the doctors, though, just in case there are any unwanted repercussions.

Can I make 'em scream?

DEAR JANE: MY housemate is a real lad who brings home a different girl every week, and invariably ends up with them in his bedroom having noisy and passionate sex.

The girls make such a racket it is obvious they are enjoying it, and my housemate seems to be able to go on for hours.

Although I've never had any complaints about my technique between the sheets, the girls I've slept with have never sounded that enthusiastic. And to be honest ten minutes is about as long as I can manage!

I keep comparing myself to my housemate and now I've lost all confidence in my lovemaking abilities.

Please tell me how I can please a girl in bed like he can?

JANE SAYS: JUST because his girls make a noise during sex it doesn't mean he's the world's greatest lover.

Everyone is different, and some people prefer to make love in silence.

Relax, and don't try to compete with him - quantity isn't everything. When you meet someone you can connect with emotionally, you'll find lovemaking can be sublime.

Too nice to get a girl

DEAR JANE: I AM a 25-year-old man who has always treated women with respect and consideration.

I would never lie or cheat or deceive, as some men do, as to my mind women are like precious jewels to be worshipped.

So why do I find it so difficult to meet a girlfriend.

The the men I know who behave badly towards women seem to have no problem pulling them at all?

I am starting to think women prefer men who treat them like dirt, but it goes against the grain for me to be like that. I don't want to be a rat just to get a girl.

Can a man be too nice?

JANE SAYS: SOMETIMES they can, yes. All women want to be treated with respect, but most don't really want to be put on a pedestal and treated like jewels.

What they want is to be thought of as an equal partner. Keep the respect, but treat them as people rather than objects and you might have better luck.

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