DEAR JANE: I AM being tempted into sex by my sister-in-law, and I don't know how much longer I can manage to resist her.

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I hadn't met my partner's older sister until recently as she lives and works in New Zealand. She came back last month for their brother's wedding, and she's been staying with us on and off ever since.

When I did meet her I did a double take because she is so like my partner to look at it's quite unsettling, but she has a very different personality.

She is outgoing, almost in your face. My partner is quite shy and quiet, although they both have the same sense of fun.

I'm a charge nurse, and my shift means I am here for part of the day while my partner is at work, so I was left to entertain her sister.

She's flirty and funny and we got on well. Then I started to sense she was attracted to me.

Whenever she looked at me I saw desire in her eyes. There was a lot of touching. She'd run her fingers down my arm in passing, or stroke my hand. It was all done casually, but I knew what she was thinking because I was thinking it too.

One day we were in the supermarket together when she suddenly grabbed hold of me and kissed me. She said she just felt like it and I have to say, it felt good.

We kissed for ages when we got back home, and if I hadn't had to go to work I know I'd have ended up in bed with her.

Next day she suggested we have sex. She said as we both wanted to and she'd be going back to New Zealand there'd be no repercussions. I so wanted to say yes, but then I thought of my partner and I couldn't. She hasn't mentioned it since, but I know I only have to say the word.

She's going home soon and I am becoming obsessed with the idea of making love to her. I'm torn.

On the one hand I'm afraid I'll regret it if I don't, and won't be able to get her out of my mind. But I'm also afraid I'll regret it if I do, and end up feeling so guilty I'll tell my partner. What should I do for the best?

JANE SAYS: FORGET it. If you have sex with her it'll only stoke up your desire and then you certainly won't be able to get her out of your mind.

You'll despise yourself for cheating, and if you end up confessing to your partner she'll be devastated that two people she thought loved her could betray her in such a treacherous way.

Tell the sister you're not interested, and keep out of her way until she's on the plane home. She'll soon fade from your mind.

Shall I give tranny a try?

DEAR JANE: A FEW months ago I started up an internet friendship with a post-op transsexual woman who is in her 30s, and she now wants us to meet up.

She has sent me some suggestive messages and I have agreed to visit her.

I am a divorced man in my late 50s and I am straight. But I am also an admirer of transsexual girls, and I find some of them to be very attractive.

While I feel a bit nervous about this meeting, she has said there is no need to feel that way and she does not seem to mind the age difference.

It has been an ambition of mine for a while to meet a transsexual because up until now I have only seen them in pictures.

We get on very well on the phone, so should I accept her invitation?

JANE SAYS: SHE has had the op so she's just like any other woman, and if she regards herself as straight there's no reason why you should think of her as being in any way different.

There is no harm in meeting up, but don't go to her home at first-make sure it's on neutral ground. Go with an open mind and you should soon see if there's any future with her.

Caught red handed

DEAR JANE: MY wife and I enjoyed an active sex life until she died, and I miss her very much.

Although I am 77, I still have a good sex drive and since I lost my wife I obtain sexual relief pleasuring myself while watching porn films.

I was doing this last week when my daughter walked in on me. She has a key and usually rings before she calls round, but this time she didn't.

To make matters worse she'd brought her friend with her, so they both got a shock-as did I. She said it was disgusting, and called me a dirty old man before walking out. What should I do now?

JANE SAYS: SHE was shocked and embarrassed but you weren't doing anything wrong.

Masturbation is a natural way of obtaining sexual relief. Anyway, it was her fault for walking into your house without even knocking. Write her a note saying you are sorry if you offended her-and that she can guard against it happening again by knocking first.

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