Why won’t he kiss me?

Q: I've been seeing my boyfriend for two years. Everything is going well except recently he's stopped French kissing me. He says it's nothing against me, he just doesn't really like it. I'm upset because I think it's one of the nicest ways to be intimate. Is he going off me? Alice, by email

Toxic: If it had been two weeks, I'd have slated your technique. But two years?! Blimey. The good news is, unless other things are changing, there's no evidence he's going off you. The bad news is he's developed a mental issue with getting his mouth near yours. Why? Maybe a colleague called him 'death breath'. I don't know. But I do know that if you want to reinstate the tonsil hockey, you have to go into praise overdrive. You don't miss French kissing. You miss French kissing him. Because he is the best kisser ever. Lay it on thick and you'll massage his ego. Massage his ego and he'll tickle your tongue.

Tantric: There's a reason why a lot of prostitutes do "everything but" kissing. It's one of the most intimate things you can do together. Chances are your man isn't thinking of someone else - he's just gotten lazy. A lot of guys kiss in order to get laid. But once they achieve their goal, they forget all about foreplay. But when women stop getting kissed, we stop wanting to get into bed. So there's an easy way to fix this: stop having sex. Once you tell him that penetration is off the menu until sucking face makes a comeback, he should re-evaluate his seduction technique. Hopefully, you'll be making out like teenagers in no time.

Q: My sleazy boss (who owns the company) keeps trying to flirt with me. I'm worried about the Christmas party. What if he makes a pass at me? I don't want to lose my job. Lisa, by email

Toxic: Play him at his own game. Just kidding! This is about safety in numbers. Make sure someone else is always present - if you have a witness, CEO Sleazebag has a tribunal on his wandering hands. Ask female colleagues to keep an eye on you - it's likely they're dreading his beer-fuelled booty-pinching too. But in the long-term you have a choice: keep smiling or cry harassment. It's your call, but remember, you're an employee not a lap dancer.

Tantric: Don't you wish Hallmark made a sexual harassment greeting card for these special moments? No matter how tempting the open bar gets, stay sober. The more hammered you are, the more he'll take advantage. Then leave early and shake his hand. If it wanders, say: "You're my boss. Let's keep things between us strictly professional. If you don't knock it off, I'll hit you with a lawsuit so fast, your head will spin. Merry Christmas!"

The Toxic Guide to: Proposing

The Toxic Bachelor takes you on a journey into men's minds. But be warned it ain't pretty...

Jess has tied the knot. Lisa's engaged. Wendy's waltzing up the aisle. My point? Don't buy the blank looks - men know your mates' marital status. And we know if you're itching to join them. So if we haven't asked, it's because we don't believe in marriage, we aren't capable of supporting you, or none of our mates have done the deed yet. It means we aren't ready for the hitched-up highway, a rocky road with two exits: death and divorce. Yep, that's how men view marriage. When we do pop the question - women must never ask - we do it believing we'll be together forever, and we won't sleep before getting down on one knee. Proposing's petrifying, but it's a moment when even the most macho man tries a little tenderness. So if your partner does it in his football team's centre circle, be warned - his priorities read: United. Kids. Wife. In. That. Order.

Email your questions to toxicandtantric@fabulousmag.co.uk

PHOTOGRAPHY: LANCTON ILLUSTRATION: SPENCER WILSON STUART IS REGULARS EDITOR OF FHM TANTRIC AND TOXIC REGRET THEY CAN'T ANSWER EMAILS PERSONALLY